


Beards For Bards

by Weaving_In_Words



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Lord of the Rings RPF, Merlin (TV)
Genre: Beards, Beards (Facial Hair), Daily Dose of Humour, Gen, Humour, Humur, News Media, craziness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-24
Updated: 2013-08-24
Packaged: 2017-12-24 13:23:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/940482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Weaving_In_Words/pseuds/Weaving_In_Words
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Camelot's Court Warlock sits down for a cup of tea, some very interesting details are found out...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Beards For Bards

**Author's Note:**

> Enjoy this short drabble I wrote after having yet another crazy idea. :)  
> And before I forget, I do not own Merlin. Or any other character that appears in this. :D

Merlin Emrys took the opportunity of his free afternoon to sit down with his boiling tea and read through the latest  _Druid News_. He hadn't been able to do any reading lately thanks to the Prat insisting he helped out with the council meetings when there was absolutely no need. But Arthur had decided that just because  _he_  had to go to those meetings with the stuffy old nobles,  _Mer_ lin had to as well. _Clotpole_.

He shifted through the paper, past the advertisements for strange crystals giving magical powers and evil beasts that could be kept as pets, tearing out the column of useful herbs for Gaius, reached for a biscuit, when suddenly an article in the fashion column caught his eye. He normally never read those, with the tips of how to be inconspicuous as possible for when attacking Camelot, knowing better to trust his own judgement and clumsiness. After all, he had managed to survive ten years without anyone realizing who he really was. A moving picture of Dragoon the Great grinned back up at him, along with several unfamiliar faces.

** Fashion for Long Beards? **

**It appears that Long Beards have become the Latest Trend for Male Magicians for the next few centuries, with hair growing down to the middle and/or to the knees. And who's to blame them?**

**Here we have a clear example of Gandalf the White, and his twin Gandalf the Grey, both looking enormously powerful in their long beards and dark cloaks. The staffs next to them are just the right touch for looking like the new fashion icon for younger wizards.**

**Their enemy Saruman likewise attempts to pull this look off, but not nearly with the same effect as the Gandalf brothers. Must be the doing of the Ring, no doubt.**

**And now we have Dumbledore, talking to a young Mr Potter (who will most likely follow this trend). And although he has no staff, Dumbledore's wand completes the powerfulness effect.**

** A tip: ** **Dumbledore ranges his beard by shortening it, lengthening it, adding hoops to it, and even on some occasions plaiting it. Well, if you're as brilliant as Dumbledore (or as mad), why not?**

**But who started this trend? Who caused such a havoc which led to "** **_The Best Beard of the Year_ ** **" Awards? Who?**

**Young women from** _Druid News_ **and** _Witch Weekly_ **have teamed up, and our assistants Nimue and Morgause share their verdict:**

**"** **_It appears that this trend had started as early as King Arthur's years, when the Warlock Emrys was appointed as Court Magician. At first, Merlin merely wore the beard as an experiment, however as he continued to run after the King and his knights, fixing their mishaps during several of their adventures, protecting Camelot from evil foes, and fulfilling Destiny's plan, it seems that the Beard has come to stay."_ **

**Think that it is time for the Warlock Emrys (aka. Dragoon the Great) to shave off his beard and retire his post? Or do you agree with us that the Merlin looks good with beard? Send your views and the results will be posted in next week's article, and you may even have a chance of winning a full beautifying potion half-price.**

To say he was furious was an understatement. How dare they comment on his beard! What right did they have to even talk about it?! And who were those insolent fools who thought they could steal his beard idea?! He was after all, rather proud of his snowy white beard that reached his chest. But after reading that article he had every mind to prove them wrong.

Right, it was time to find a mirror, and some sharp blade...

**Author's Note:**

> There was an Old Man with a beard,  
> Who said: "It is just as I feared! -  
> Two Owls and a Hen, four Larks and a Wren,  
> Have all built their nests in my beard.  
> \- Edward Lear
> 
> Liked this? Then you will totally love my other fic "Surrender! Or Feel My Wrath!"  
> (I assure you, it's just as crazy as this fic :P)
> 
> Don't forget to review!!


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